Thinks it's great when the people you love, know your EVIL side and think it's FUNNY.
The best person who can help you out of your problems is the one you see in the mirror.
I'm not CRAZY or INSANE--I'm just mentally entertaining.
When i smile, the devil gets a shiver down her spine.
When life gives you lemons, get some salt and tequila and suck it up!
I don't see him as your leftovers, I see him as a job you were not prepared for so a real woman took over!
Me? Mad? Of course not! I simply want to give you a high-five...in the face!
Every day is a new chance to be happy about something different.
Husband and wife go past a field of sheep, goats, and pigs, the husband asks sarcastically, "Relatives of yours?","Yep," the wife replied, "in-laws.
I am more than just an option, I am the preferred choice
Don't make YOUR problem MY problem, because you won't like how I handle it.
A friend is someone who will bail you out of jail at 3:00am. A TRUE friend is sitting next to you in the jail cell going "DAMN that was fun!"